Guy 2 is able to show that he’s done some interesting things. Guy 3 has taken the girl on an emotional journey with him.
He’s established that they have something basic in common. He told her about something he’d wanted to do as a child. He painted a vivid picture of the story, which allowed the girl to feel and join an emotional journey with him.
After studying this in depth, I found patterns of behavior that can keep you from making great conversation with people. You can overcome this simply by learning a few new skills, such as the ones listed below.
One of these common behaviors is the habit of holding back from saying something until you’ve “checked” with yourself to make sure that what you’re about to say is cool, impressive, smart, and interesting. Once you do that, you’ll be able to talk to new people, and make friends, much more easily.
The same principles apply for more mundane and everyday conversations. oh and we went to restaurant X where I had the most delicious pasta I’ve had in ages. Guy 1 is boring, ordinary and clearly has nothing cool to talk about. She will have forgotten about what he said by the time he’s finished his conversation.
It was this really light spaghetti combined with a rich herb and mince sauce with just a mild kick of spice that rounded it off perfectly. The question at the end is standard, typical and boring. She’ll also have to go back and think harder about what she ate on the weekend as it’s a more unusual question than what she’d be used to.
If you can’t picture something somebody’s telling you, you’re not going to get invested in it. I’m definitely keen to go back and travel to more of Europe next time. One of the countries I went to was France, partly because I’d always wanted to see the Eiffel Tower.