Looking up from the blank page to the blinking clock, he discovered it was only three-fifteen.He decided that today was perhaps the longest day of his life.
The joke is that Tristram (the narrator) keeps trying to tell the story of his life, but keeps getting distracted by millions of other thoughts, and goes off into so many digressions that the author Laurence Sterne pretty much died while he was still writing it.
It's impossible to describe and a lot of people find it impossible to read, but I loved it so much that I nearly came to blows with someone at college who slagged it off.
(Review by Joseph O'Connor) The worry for fans of Norfolk's finest export was that this autobiography might be an idea too far.
Could the Partridge concept really sustain a 300 page life story in his own words? Writers Neil and Rob Gibbons have delivered a brilliant gag-fest pitched perfectly in Alan's nightmarish inner voice: "Putting a damp spoon back in the bowl is the tea-drinking equivalent of sharing a needle.
Here are nine such examples of contestant responses that must be seen to be believed.